This will be our fourth thanksgiving without Evan, and while three years have passed since he died I’d like to say the holidays get better, but that’s not entirely true. His absence is still felt, like a scary black hole into the mysterious unknown. But the holidays have slowly become less about just ‘getting through it’ and more about cherishing the moment with those that surround me, realizing how fragile life can be.
This Thanksgiving, a quote comes to mind from the Divergent book series by Veronica Roth (yes, I’ve been able to read again during my precious time away from volunteer commitments!). She says, through one of the main characters, “Since I was young, I have always known this: Life damages us, every one. We can’t escape that damage. But now, I am also learning this: We can be mended. We mend each other.”
So on this day of giving thanks, I am thankful for those people who help mend me. These people are family and friends, MAMTEB and alike, but a few people are especially receiving my thanks this year.
- My mom and dad, for being strong for me.
- My main squeeze and PIC, Brycen, plus the new family I have gained through his.
- The many survivors of suicide loss that I have come to know through support groups and AFSP volunteer opportunities.
- My amazing friends that care in ways above and beyond a typical friendship: ballet friends, college friends, Olympia friends and colleagues. I may have lost touch with some of you, but I often park my thoughts on memories with you that bring a smile.
What are you thankful for?